Your Kids Aren’t Built To Handle This Much Stuff
Four Game-Changing Tips On How To Help Your Little Ones With Their Toys
Let’s be honest. Every parent has been there. That moment when you lose it because your kid’s stuff has taken over your house! It’s incredibly frustrating, overwhelming, and can cause some serious conflicts in the household. If you have the magic secret to keeping your kid’s toys and craft supplies organized… and stay that way, I'm all ears. Kids are supposed to be creative, busy, hot messes! That’s how they learn, explore, and create relationships. But that also doesn’t mean that they can’t learn how to take care of and appreciate their possessions by tidying. Here are a few tips I have had more success with that might give you ideas on handling the kid clutter.
Your kids have too much stuff. The average 10-year-old kid has 238 toys yet only plays regularly with 12. No wonder it's so hard for them to tidy, take care of, and be grateful for what they own! If you expect your child to independently organize that amount of stuff, I hate to tell you that this won't kick in for most people until they are well out of their teen years. Most kids will struggle, become agitated (cue the tantrum), or just freeze out of the sheer overwhelm. So, the best way to handle this is to take out what they aren't playing with and be mindful of what you bring into the home. This may also mean that you have that difficult but necessary conversation with family members and ask them to offer experiences vs. plastic toys you have no room for!
Your child hasn't practiced the act of letting things go. If your child struggles to purge broken toys, items that haven't seen daylight in 3 years, and has an immense attachment to things (like that old gum wrapper from last fall behind his bed), this is super normal. Kids easily receive toys but are not taught the gratuitous act of giving them away when it is time. That's why it's essential to donate, clean their playroom, and throw things away that are no longer useable on a regular basis - TOGETHER... NOT JUST YOU! You may not remove much the first few times, but having conversations like why this toy would be better off with a child who truly needs it is incredibly important. A great tip for building trust with your child is to create a monthly tub of toys that gets filled up, stored away, and brought out again. This will show your child that you respect his attachment; he may fall back in love with a toy all over again or become aware that he didn't need it after being away.
Your organizational styles clash. If you are on the frustrated parent train when it comes to your kids not cleaning up their stuff, it may be because they do not organize the same way you do and have difficulty figuring out your system (especially kids under the age of 5). Most kids need easy, visual solutions, not complex, compartmentalized, hidden systems. This is where I see a big battle because many parents like things tucked away out of sight, which is challenging for kids to maintain. A big game-changer is a simple trick of using clear bins vs. woven/cloth. Label things not only with words but with pictures for little ones to understand. Also, stop re-organizing the room multiple times a year. Your kids finally begin to understand a system, and then you change it on them!
Check your attitude and tone. If you approach tidying as an awful chore and screaming at your kids at the top of your lungs to help, they will associate cleaning with crappy connotations for the rest of their lives. We have to flip the switch in our heads that tidying and taking care of our possessions is a great thing. It allows us to appreciate our belongings and be grateful for the chance to use them. Being supportive and encouraging our little ones early in life in this process will help as they grow up to continue the practice. Some valuable strategies for little ones are to:
Make a game out of it. Ex. “How many stuffies can you put away before the 30-second timer goes off? Can you beat Daddy?”
Provide expectations ahead of time. Ex. ”That’s great that you are being creative with your LEGO! When the 15-minute timer goes off, that means we have to start putting it back in the bin before supper is ready."
Notice what they aren't playing with and ask if they are okay with parting with it. Ex. “I noticed that you haven't been playing with your dinosaurs lately. It looks like you have 12 of them. Can you show me your best six and tell me which ones we can give to another kid who loves dinosaurs just as much as you?”
Be supportive of their creativity and play. Ex. “Wow! Look at this beautiful collage you made! Tell me about why you chose those colors. Can I give you a hand with putting your art supplies away? How about you put the glue away, and I'll pack up the glitter!”
Don’t expect your kids to complete a full cleaning marathon when they are tired, hungry, or have no guidance that’s appropriate for their age.
“The average 10-year-old kid has 238 toys yet only plays regularly with 12.”
Playroom Purge Sessions
These tips and strategies may take time to implement for the family, and you may need to change them up as they get older, but stick with it! If you need help in this department, I have a Playroom Purge Session that might be the perfect fit for you and your little ones before Christmas.
